Hot Mess Mom » Dear Diary, I may be PMSing... » you shouldn’t put expired things in your vagina
you shouldn’t put expired things in your vagina
Because of Murphy’s Law… of course my monthly hemorrhage session was scheduled to be during the Million MILF March. I can’t have that. I just can’t. So, I did what any rational, mature, and responsible person would do in my situation. I found an old NuvaRing leftover from a prescription a few years ago, and placed that bad boy right up the ol’ punani. Now, I won’t have to be miserable until after the MMM.
However, over the past few days, I’ve been increasingly emotional. My hormones are crazy. I keep crying and then falling into bouts of hysterical laughter. I’m sure part of it is caused by stress. But the total manic nature of my moods, can only be caused by hormones.
I checked the NuvaRing packet. It expired 08/11. I’m keeping it in, but for future reference, I think maybe you shouldn’t put expired things in your vagina.
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Oh my…. I won’t drink milf that is a couple days from expiring let alone stick something in my twat that has…. poor expired vag ring…. are you gonna have a funeral for it?
Has anyone noticed that I typed “expired milf” instead of “expired milk”? I will drink neither past the expiration date, just so we are clear….
Gurl-be careful with that Nuva Ring-raised my BP and made me psycho. And I already am psycho. Have a great time!
I LOVE that you actually admit to doing this, and that you are responsible enough to leave it in… LOL I tried to get my Doctor to put me on the pill so I wouldn’t be on during my Florida vacation, and she told me “I was too old”… I would probably have done the same thing… So did the next best thing… Novasure… I had the eblasion done and haven’t had any monthly visitors in 2 years…
HAPPY ME!!!
Um. I adore you. I seriously adore you.
My ‘resident pharmacist’ says do not rely on it for protection.
I working on just getting rid of the whole uterus…I am forty, my tubes are tied, what do I need it for anyway…It will be the end of a big pain…
I hope you have a good time…
i only had it for regulation purposes..it was never used for birth control.. and yeah. i’m with you.. that redonkulous thing is overrrated.
LOL!!!!! This cracks me up! I’ve never put an expired Nuva Ring in my vagina, but i’ve used some old smashed up Tampons that were found on the bottom of my purse covered in cracker crumbs from the kids. Desperation at it’s finest!
Heck, i have 10 cans of tuna that expired in 2008 in my basement. Maybe i’ll make a casserole. You have inspired me tolive on the edge.
ha! you said ‘tuna’ !!
THIS just made my night! thank you. retweeted. and thank you again.
oh gosh! Yeah that’s a little scary! Hope you even out soon!
And I thought I was bad using shortening that expired three years ago! LOL Hope the hormones stay at bay until after MMM! Good luck!
Okay I’m not getting your emails again! I can’t believe I missed this! I’m crying I’m laughing so hard
Somehow I missed this the first time, but I certainly needed the laugh tonight.
Hope everything came out all right!
So appreciate you for sharing!
Well ladies, I could continue reading “The Adventures of Hot Mess Mom” the remainder of the day, but unfortunately I can’t! :’(