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Hot Mess Mom » Million MILF March » Million MILF March from YOUR perspective.

Million MILF March from YOUR perspective.

Meet my friend Liese.  She is you.  She is a Hot Mess Mom reader.  She lives 600 miles away from me.  We became friends.

She sent me this yesterday,  unsolicited because she knows I’m stressed about both the event planning and my lack of writing.  So she fixed both.  Cuz she’s a fixer.  Like Kerry Washington on Scandal.  Except different.   I kind of love her.

Million Milf March, A Life Changer

So, my lovely friend, Hot Mess Mom, has been super busy with her cartoon world life. Because of her work trips, product fulfillment, Million Milf March planning, flooded house, house demo and construction, marriage to a sexpot who travels for work, AND three kids in school, her hilarious blog has become well… empty. I’m all about helping a sister out, so I thought you would all like to hear MY take on the Million Milf March, which is happening again soon. It’s time to make your plans, and this is why: The Million Milf March changed my life, and it will change yours too.

Two years ago I met Hot Mess Mom. It was a real life meeting, a dinner in New Orleans (Borgne…so fkn yummy), with another HMM reader and a friend. Great night, great food, great drinks, and a friendship was born. I was (am) a stay at home mom with some time on my hands. I was ready to get to work and help this funny lady launch the Million Milf March.  I didn’t help her. She did it all, like a machine. Because she is amazing.

Fast forward six months to the Million Milf March. I don’t even have words to accurately describe the entire weekend. On Thursday I picked up seven of my new best friends from the airport, it was hot. It was 90 degrees at least, probably 100. It was a week after Hurricane Isaac kicked our asses. I was nervous. I got my oil changed, got a new windshield, new brake inspection, gassed up, packed up and headed to the airport.

With my handy homemade sign, I found my passengers, loaded up my SUV and headed out on the fifteen minute drive to our hotel in New Orleans. How cool was it that my air conditioner in the car went out? How perfect. Seven strangers in my car driving downtown without A/C. I was so embarrassed. You know what they did? Rolled the windows down and thanked me. WTF? We laughed the whole way, we joked about it after. We had fun.

I’d love to tell you all about our great hotel but that isn’t important or relevant to the weekend. It could have been a Super 8 and the weekend would have been just as amazing.

A small group of early arrivals had dinner with the Hot Mess, including my mom, HMM’s best friends from college, her besties from her neighborhood, a handful of HMM readers, KMB and myself. We ate at Borgne again, are you sensing a trend in our dining habits? So damn delicious. We ended this night at some bar downtown Nola, there was copious amounts of whiskey, beer and I think tequila. We ate, we drank, we fell down, and we laughed.

Friday was the official kick off of the Million Milf March. The lovely ladies started arriving. The laughter was everywhere. Online friends became real life friends. We paraded to the Friends In Need auction, we ate, we drank, we danced, and we laughed.

Saturday was the pub crawl and believe me, some of us were very close to actually crawling. More Milfs arrived. We strolled from Earnst Café to the Red Eye (naked bar tenders), on to the Howling Wolf, and ended with a great party with great food, great music, and a photo booth! We ate, we drank, we danced, and we laughed.

I met stay at home moms, working moms, single moms, young moms, older moms, people who have moms, people who know a mom. I met people from Georgia, Michigan, California, Oregon, Florida, Louisiana, and Canada.  We were sisters.

My weekend ended in HMM’s hotel room. We laughed. We cried. We were amazed.

In the next few days I had so many new Facebook friends I can’t even count. Two weeks later I had a major surgery and received care packages from my new Million Milf Marcher friends from all over the country. It was an indescribable feeling.

Since the MMM, I have visited with my new friends on multiple occasions. I have visited their homes and met their families. I have welcomed them to my home and toured them around my home town. I have changed. Did HMM change me? Of course not! Did she spark something in me that prompted a better version of me? Maybe, but I would never tell her that. She likes to think that she made me a grown up, I think she made me a person who now pees outside.

The Second Annual Million Milf March is right around the corner. I strongly encourage you to attend. It’s not a weekend to sit and hold hands with HMM (unless you’re a VIP), but it’s a weekend to forget about the pressure of being a mom, a wife, a daughter, a sister, a responsible adult. This is the weekend you get to let loose and just be the funniest version of you that you can muster.

I will be there, I hope ya’ll will be too!

 


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23 Responses to "Million MILF March from YOUR perspective."

  1. I hope that one day that I can meet some amazing people that I have built relationships with online and from blogging. I haven’t attended a conference and hope that I can go to one in the future. Thank you for sharing your story, it is inspiring.

  2. Sarah says:

    This post makes me even more bummed that I cannot attend!! Damn resposibilities!

  3. KMB says:

    Ahhh, the memories! It really was the most fabulous weekend and I couldn’t be happier that I went. This is an eerily similar account to my experience. Although I have to miss it this year, I will not miss another one! I haven’t laughed that much in 3 days E V E R. EVER. I heart you Liese & HMM.

  4. Carrie says:

    So proud of my bestie for this post! You are so funny! I’m trying to get there for the MMM. I too have had my first “pee” not in an appropriate location with my bestie in NOLA. It was in a food court, bathrooms were closed so the track can looked appropriate, oh the memories. She always has made me laugh til I cry and I am so lucky to have know her my whole, as long as I can remember life”

  5. Carrie says:

    That would be trash can. Not enough coffee yet

  6. Kassie says:

    Great job, Turtle!

  7. yournewbff says:

    Such a fantastic weekend. It was what Disney World is to a toddler… if you allowed the toddler to run rampant through the streets of the “Magic Kingdom” in a milk-induced stupor. Meeting these beautiful MILFS from all over the country was what it is like to a five year old girl who meets Cinderella at a Character breakfast. It was Awe-inspiring. Except in this case, Cinderella had 3 kids, drove a mini-van, smoked Marlboros and drank brown liquor could dance like there’s no tomorrow to a fabulous 80′s cover band while molesting a dude in a gorilla suit. It was super fantastic!

    I cannot wait to attend this year. We will drink and dance and see old friends, and make new ones and have a great time and laugh and dance and fall down and laugh and laugh and laugh!

  8. Liese says:

    Kassie, this year we will have to bring extra Merrrrrrrrrrlot for Linda.

  9. Michelle says:

    I was pretty sure I was going anyway, but this pretty much seals the deal!

  10. Claudia says:

    I can’t help but think you wouldn’t have your windshield changed to pick me up at the airport, would you? Since I’m not pregnant this year… Again, I was gonna come, then you said 100 degrees. Now I’m not too sure.

    Great post Liese :)

  11. Lori Carr says:

    Very well written.Friends are few and far between…Well ones you really like..This is a great column written by a great friend who would hold my hair back if I needed her to.Great job!!!!!

  12. Belley says:

    So funny and witty!!! I know she loves all her milfs like sisters but I am lucky enough to be her actual sister!!! It truly did change her! I have been trying to get her to pee outside for YEARS!!! Getting my drink on with Liese is my favorite past time so I’m looking forward to doing it at this event. Can’t wait!

  13. Jen says:

    I wasn’t able to attend last year but heard ALL about that fab time! What better reasons then alcohol, great food and great company do you need to join this occasion?!?! Well said Lies!!!

  14. D'anne aka Liese's Mommie says:

    OMG, Carrie!!! You “peed” in a trash can in a food court!!! And, there were so many other choices. Behind cas, steps & stoops, just to mention a few. Loved last year & Liese is not only a great Mom, she’s a great daughter. And she makes me laugh so hard & combined with her Little sister they just kill me. Hope everyone comes this year.

  15. Carla Large says:

    Sounds great, I’m sold!!

  16. Kim says:

    Not boring.

    1. Kim says:

      Liese you did a wonderful job of showing the “un-initiated” what the event is about.

  17. krista says:

    I feel like I just experienced the MMM firsthand thanks to your awesome writing Liese. Thank you for the vivid recreation of what seems like a total blast of a time!! Super bummed we will miss it this year but there is always next year! In the meantime I will attempt to master my outdoor peeing skills!! Have fun ladies! ;-)

  18. Carrie says:

    Omg! Dee!!! I did, noty proudest moment, but one I will remember forever! I had alot of drinks and needed to piddle!

  19. Karen says:

    Hey Liese, this is a great post! You have sold me on the Million MILF March! Thanks for making me laugh out loud and also tear up a little, all in one blog. :) You are the best! xoxo

  20. Liese says:

    You guys are all too kind. I’m speechless….
    Not really, I always have something to say.

    I wish I could edit this with everything I left out. Ya’ll will just have to show up to see that there is so much more to this than I wrote about. Its amazing.

    Now my dad wants to know where I pee outside…

  21. Lacie says:

    After several conversations with myself (because yes, most of the day I am the only adult in the room) I have come to the decision that because this year, so far, **fingers crossed** my uterus is currently not occupied with a child, I need some me and turtle time!!
    Good job on twisting my arm ;) I think Andrew can handle watching the kids lick the wall for one night…….cant wait :))

  22. J says:

    I’ll be there with bells on this year & strategically placing olives & maraschino cherries on the steps of anyone
    who tries to get in my way!

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