Hot Mess Mom » Dear Diary, Grown-up time » Marijuana : Merlot… is there really a difference?
Marijuana : Merlot… is there really a difference?
This article was posted on Today.com this morning. Pot smoking moms tired of being judged by wine drinkers? It is a great article and makes lots of excellent points.
I will leave it to you to read the article and won’t spend time going through all of the data and opinions.
I drink wine.
I have smoked pot; although not as an adult.
Alcohol and marijuana are both used to self medicate.
Both are used to “take the edge off”
Some people cannot drink. Some people do not want to drink.
I get it.
My only problem with parents who smoke pot is this.. ( and..honestly, I’m not judging.. I’m just saying….)
Marijuana is illegal. It shouldn’t be, but it is.
Engaging in illegal activity of any sort is irresponsible.
I drink alcohol. I do not drive after drinking. That would be illegal. That would be irresponsible. That would be a poor example for my children.
It is so hard to raise children. It is hard to teach them right from wrong. To respect authority even if they don’t agree with it. To make good decisions. As an adult, we are capable of living in grey areas. Children don’t get the grey. The know right and wrong. If your child knows you smoke marijuana (which they do… or they will….no matter how well you hide it), I think it’s hard for them to reconcile their parent breaking the rules. And if it’s okay to break that rule, and by “rule” , I mean “law”… then what other rules laws are okay to break?
Do I get to choose the
ruleslaws that I want to obey? If I don’t agree with arulelaw because it’s stupid, then do I not have to follow it?
I think it sends such a mixed message… specifically in the homes where it is hidden from the kids. If you aren’t ashamed to smoke and do so openly and discuss it with your children, they probably have a better grasp of the “grey”.. However, if you are hiding in the garage that is always locked and secret… the appearance is that you are doing something super extra double doggy wrong.
Again.. by no means am I anti-marijuana. I honestly believe it should be legal, regulated, and taxed. But it’s not.
What are your thoughts? I would LOVE to hear them (and please don’t yell at me and be ugly… I’m honestly not judging…I just think it’s a hard situation)
 | If you liked this post, please consider leaving a comment, share, or subscribe to RSS feed |
Filed under: Dear Diary, Grown-up time
RELATED POSTS & INTERESTSMy trip to the liquor storeI think "life lesson", my boys think "homeless man's toilet water"I had a slow leak (not a metaphor) and now I need a wife.This is how Seven & I fightMy house may actually get CLEAN today! |
You can have a glass or two of wine without being “drunk”. You can not smoke pot without getting high. There is a difference.
Each person handles substance differently and smoking pot doesn’t mean getting so high you can’t function. If you can’t see the positives that marijuana has for people’s medical conditions and that it’s not a dangerous drug then you haven’t completed your research. Someone said it above, get a prescription, do it right. I’m a mom and open pot smoker, it eases my medical conditions and doesn’t affect my productivity or lifestyle with my children at all. My family is very well taken care of and I wish people could see that as an adult you should be able to determine what’s best for you and your health.
Pot and alcohol are the same when it comes to getting “high”. one or two puffs off a joint will create a buzz that is completely functionally just as one or two drinks will give you a buzz that is completely functional as well. Tolerance also has to be taken into effect here. Two drinks for my girlfriend and she’s too impaired to drive which is the same for her when she smokes (almost never).
“It can make folding a pile of laundry fun,” “If I didn’t smoke, that’d be three piles later in the week.”
Since when does pot smoking make you more productive??? I call BS!
If I was that concerned over getting the laundry done, I’d choose a different drug to get all the shit done!
To me, it’s just another way moms are bashing one another for the choices we make every day.. Whether its breast feeding or not, or smoking dope or drinking wine…. why can’t we just support one another already? Jeesh!
To me the main point of difference is that smoking pot is illegal although like you I don’t believe it should be, it is. You cannot get arrested for buying a bottle of wine, vodka whatever but you can get arrested for buying weed and how do you explain that to your children?
I totally agree with you on all counts!! Marijuana is no worse than alcohol. It should be legal and taxed….we could reduce our deficit in a hurry! I also can’t believe that medicinal marijuana is not legal everywhere.
I also agree with your stance on setting a good example for your children and obeying the rules (except the speed limit…I have a lead foot!).
It’s silly that it’s illegal. Pot mellows people whereas alcohol can also make people violent. Since it is illegal though, I want to my kids to know that getting caught smoking it can get you into a heap of trouble and make your life suck, so it’s not worth it.
If you want to smoke pot, get a prescription so its not illegal and be done with it.
I have never seen anyone get behind the wheel after smoking pot and kill someone like with alcohol. I have never seen anyone get in a fight after smoking pot but I friendships have ended because of alcohol. I have never seen anyone freak out on weed but I have known of people who have died in the transaction of acquiring pot. Alcohol is a poison, weed is a natural plant. The debate could go on…. no judging, just livin’
Real statistics… I could go on forever here but will try to make simple points.
CDC records over 37000 deaths per year directly attributable to alcohol.
CDC does not even have a category for marijuana.
There has NEVER been an overdose of marijana…EVER.
A question to ask is why the stigma? Why the laws?
Well, our friendly pharmaceutical companies that get us hooked on chemicals that kill us or hurt us might not like a PLANT that heals and serves us.
As a former pot smoker ( like everyday in my 20s) this is a tough one. While I agree that marijuana has many medicinal benefits (I am an oncology nurse and know some of my patients would really benefit!!) I also think our society does not need another reason to be unproductive or paranoid. I def agree in medicinal use.
Pot is an illegal substance. So breaking this law in front of my kids, or condoning it, makes me an irresponsible parent..? Same sex marriage is also “not permitted” in how many states? So by allowing my kids to be in contact with a same sex couple who call themselves ‘married’ even when the federal government says they aren’t is also irresponsible?
I will continue to openly support gay marriage and pot smoking. AND I will happily teach my children to think for themselves and make informed choices regardless of what the government tells them is right or wrong.
Kids have brains, good ones (except for choices that involve power tools)… and more sense than most people give them credit for.
Really good points in the article and in the comments! I love Gooley’s take! I am a former self-proclaimed pot-head, but quit when my husband asked me to, back when we were dating. After a few months and some could retrospective, I was able to honestly admit to myself that pot made me lazy and forgetful. Not just short-term forgetful, either. I have huge gaps in my memory from my pot-head days (college!!! I want my awesome memories back!). On the other hand, I do agree that pot-heads are considerably less likely to be violent than drunks.
Good point Gooley….doctors and drug companies promote so many synthetic drugs that are made from chemicals and basically poison and marijuana could be used to treat the same conditions with little or no side effects. I occasionally suffer from anxiety and insomnia, instead of being on a prescription drug with horrible side effects and no knowledge of what long term use will do to my body I smoke pot….it relaxes me, it stops the anxiety in its tracks and doesn’t make me lazy (maybe a little silly, but what is wrong with laughing more?). I don’t usual every smoke until my kids are in bed, and it is just a hit or two….I’m not getting totally baked. The list of conditions that marijuana help is ENDLESS! In reality, anything more than a drink or two per day is not good for your health at all (not that I am against alcohol at all). Here are some facts that back up what I am saying:
According to an approved statement from the US Department of Justice in 1988, “Nearly all medicines have toxic, potentially lethal effects. But cannabis is not such a substance. There is no record in the extensive medical literature describing a proven, documented cannabis-induced fatality. In practical terms, cannabis cannot induce a lethal response as a result of drug-related toxicity.”[54]
From January 1997 to June 2005, the U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA) reported zero deaths caused by the primary use of cannabis. In contrast, common FDA-approved drugs which are often prescribed in lieu of cannabis (such as anti-emetics and anti-psychotics), were the primary cause of 10,008 deaths.[55] The cannabinoid THC has an extremely low toxicity and the amount that can enter the body through the consumption of cannabis plants poses no threat of death.[56]
I am a mom that is all for legalizing pot. I do not smoke until after my child goes to bed. I’ve always known that my parents smoked after we went to bed but it’s a don’t ask don’t tell situation. I think that everyone is different, I do not enjoy drinking as much as I do smoking, however I will drink in front of my child. Before I had my daughter I truly was a functioning pothead. I’d smoke and go shopping clean my house from top to bottom, and make all those dreaded phone calls that mentally exhaust you (cable/phone company) maybe this country to help its self get out of debt if it was taxed and legal? I have a lot of anxiety that calms down at night after “mommy” time, I actually get a good night sleep because I’m not tossing and turning and waking up worried about things all through the night. I don’t want to take pills to help that like some people suggest, I’d rather do a natural remedy. For me 1 “medication” takes care of everything, headaches, pms, sore knees/back, and anxiety. Judge me if you want but I am a better mom because I am able to regulate my self, I see all the time on FB people talking about having a glass of wine with lunch. I don’t feel the need to do that but I don’t judge them. When my daughter gets to an appropriate age I will be 100% honest with her. I just hope the government gets on board before then!
Drug counsellors and rehabs do not distinguish. Addiction is addiction. Pot is 50-100x stronger today than when we were young. It is grown and bred intentionally this way. Why? Because it is a gateway drug. Talk to any recovering drug addict… It started w pot. If one has the disease behind alcoholism or drug abuse, one is never enough. trust me, I know. It sucks you in. Cunning, baffling, powerful. You can say, “not me,” or “only in moderation,” “just one or two,” or whatever. Hiding it, only doing it after people are in bed, etc… Are Sneaking and lying. Change the subject to “shoplifting.” “I only shoplift when the kids are in bed” — better? Result, of either behavior, lesson that cheating the system is ok. Even if illegal. Or hurtful. Or a bad idea. My point: anything in life, if you have to lie or cheat, hide it or do it behind someone’s back means that deep down, you know it is a problem. Pot is illegal. Period. People who grow and process it, to say nothing of sell it, by in large are not people u want at your house for dinner. Or you are proud to have as friends. Or you would. And don’t kid yourself that you’d never get behind the wheel. You may not intend to, but the most well intentioned have.
We take the same stand you do about pot. But because we KNOW…we take extra steps to be sure our boys understand that alcohol, although legal IS a drug as well and should be used in moderation (if at all). This doesn’t mean I don’t like to have a Mai Tai with dinner or a margarita once in awhile. I don’t judge..but I also can say..hmmm there may be a problem there..when I see frequent drinkers doing more than their fair share.
Addiction is something that I am personally very knowledgeable (obviously spelling is not in that same catagory)-unfortunately.
Addiction takes many many forms.
We have a while generation of alcoholics taking their kids to soccer practice, COACHING said practices and then cheering on those games with their “adult beverage” hidden in a water bottle.
They drink to cope.
It may not be parenthood, it may be something dark and inherently bad but it’s in their psyche and they NEED to drink or they feel they will literally split apart.
Recovery can be a great thing. It’s almost as hard as living with a alcoholic/addict but it’s still good. Better than it was.
This I know.
Later…much much later I’m sure I will share more but for now that’s all I can say.