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Hot Mess Mom » Dear Diary, Family, Ramblings » I am BLESSED and I don’t care who knows it.

I am BLESSED and I don’t care who knows it.


I just returned from a weekend in New York City with my first born. It was an incredible few days.  Truly, one of those weekends that many can only dream of.  I am blessed.

There.  I said it.  I am BLESSED.  Change “blessed” to lucky, fortunate, or any other word of your choosing.  THAT is how I feel and THAT is what I am.

Every minute of every day I am grateful.  I am grateful for the things that I have earned and the things that I have been given.  I am grateful for plain, dumb luck.

This blog (and specifically the Facebook page that accompanies it) has grown exponentially over the past few months.   While posting on Facebook this weekend, many times I wrote, and subsequently erased, the word “Blessed”.  I could see the heated arguments and the name-calling beginning before I had even written the next word.  I could almost FEEL the hatred coming from the anonymity of the interweb.

I believe in God.  I believe in Karma, I believe in putting good things out into the Universe, and in the Power of One.  I have an unyielding faith that I am but a speck in a universal plan.

I understand that not everyone feels the same and that is FINE.  Faith is personal, and my faith is my own.  And, as luck would have it, so is this page.  So, let me take a moment to explain why and how I feel blessed.

  • I am blessed to have been born to middle-class, educated, married parents.
  • I am blessed that they chose to send me to good schools and that they had the means to show me more of the world than the block we lived on.
  • I am blessed that I was able to attend college.
  • I am blessed that even in my darkest times and during my worst decisions, no real harm ever came to me.
  • I am blessed that I was able to marry for love.
  • I am blessed to have had healthy pregnancies and three healthy children.

I had nothing to do with any of these things.  Some would call me lucky.  I call me blessed.

My hesitation at using the word “blessed” on a page with a million weekly views was that, undoubtedly, there would be a faction of readers who would be offended.  There would most certainly be another faction who would be downright enraged.  So, let me clarify.

When I say “I am blessed” I am not pronouncing that God, sitting up in the heavens on a cloud shrouded throne, is looking down into Manhattan and saying “Wow.. let’s forget about global troubles.. HMM needs a limo”.   {And as absurd as that sounds, I can assure you a similar comment would have appeared}.

I watch the news and view the round-the-clock tragedies that span the globe.  And then I feel so amazingly in awe of everything I have.  And by “have”, I do not mean possessions.. I mean gifts.  Health, lodging, family, food, a husband who loves me and children who are my world.   Some of these things I’ve worked for.  Some, I’ve been given.  ALL are results of opportunities that I feel blessed to have had.

My husband and I work hard to provide a life of experiences for our children.  The work itself is something to be proud of, something that has been earned.  The opportunity for the work is a blessing.

We are blessed to have enough money to do extra things as a family and blessed to have little enough that we are excited and grateful for each opportunity.

We are blessed to have had the “lean years”.  The years we could have lost our home, the times we cried over which bills to pay.  We always had a roof and we always had perspective.

Every night, I say prayers with my children.  And every night the crux of our prayer is the same.  “Keep me safe.  Keep me strong.  Thank you for this day”. Every time we are fortunate enough to take a trip, even if just for a day, we pray in the car “Thank you for this opportunity.  Please keep us safe, keep the roads clear and the car in good working order”.  Sounds trite.. but that’s what we do.  That is how we live.

And when I forget to take a moment to be thankful for  things that could easily be taken for granted, my kids are there to remind me.  And they always do.

So..  there you have it.

I Believe.  I am Grateful.  I am Blessed.


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Filed under: Dear Diary, Family, Ramblings



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79 Responses to "I am BLESSED and I don’t care who knows it."

  1. ash says:

    HMM, I love you even more.

  2. darri healy says:

    go ahead and “be blessed” all you want sista…..i love reading it and sooo wish i could have some of you “blessings”…ciao

  3. constance says:

    I could have written this! I feel the same way. I am almost feel guilty posting my blessings on FB because so many people are less fortunate, so I keep my blessings to myself. I’ve worked very, very hard to achieve success. I’m a single Mom, I work hard, I have a beautiful son, and a wonderful and peaceful life! Most people will begrudge someone else’s success. For now, I keep mouth shut and help my friends and family when needed.

    1. Rhonda says:

      HMM and Constance — I feel exactly the same way. Constance — I too am a single mom (who doesn’t hate my ex-husband — not that he’s my favorite person), but he did give me the two most gorgeous children on earth :) I own my own house, I own my own company and I travel with (and without) my children as often as I can. Even though I didn’t have all the blessings that HMM did growing up — that has not ruled my life — I am now blessed beyond words — and like you some I earned, some I was given and everyday I just keep being thankful for those blessings and opportunities. People seem to forget that we are all given opportunities — it’s just what the individual decides to do with them that determines the outcome ! I used to feel bad or like a “braggart” when I posted my kids’ adventures or gifts they got (like the two laptops I got them for Christmas — yay me !), but not anymore. I have amazing friends and those who are not — well frankly my dear….I really just don’t give a fuck ! I love absolutely everything that comes off the page from HMM and can’t wait to read it — well and most definitely I’d just like to sit and have a glass of wine, or vodka…or possibly Jameson with you !

  4. NAN-O says:

    Kudos for being honest and providing perspective. I may not have traveled the world, but I understand your gratefulness and thank you for them. For the record, you shouldn’t have to defend your lifestyle, earned or otherwise. As an older mom of two healthy and happy elementary-age kids, I am grateful for laundry list of blessings and take nothing for granted. Blessings abound, not the least of which is reading your festive posts and blog rants. :D

  5. Jana Greene says:

    Thank you for writing and sharing this. And for calling your blessings out! God Bless you (more.)

  6. Tara says:

    I love this. I used to say, “I’m lucky…,” but I see it as more than that. I have been blessed beyond measure with things/people/situations — I don’t know what I ever did to deserve/earn them, so I just count my blessings and don’t take anything for granted.

  7. Stalker Liese says:

    You forgot the part about being blessed with your very own stalker and some amazing friends.
    And MILFs– You are blessed with Milfs and Dilfs galore!

    1. Hot Mess Mom says:

      how. could. I. forget. ? ;) Not everyone has a stalker. I am Super BLESSED!

  8. Laurin says:

    I am happy for you! but I need to disagree with you when you say YOU had nothing to do with your blessed life… you have ALOT to do with it.. no matter what your matter where you grew up. you stayed in school & went to college & got good jobs….you work @ your relationship you get up & work everyday to provide for your kids… there are people sitting on their asses feeling sorry for themselves hating on you & others for having nice things & going on trips!! ANYONE can have that!!!! I am from Long Island NY I know many many many people who grew up quite well off & who have “nothing” now…they may have the job & the car & the house but they have NOTHING that matters!!!! LI is alot about keeping up with the Joneses & one neighbor is “richer” than the other & many people marry for $$ then wind up broke when he leaves her for a younger model…. & there are many people who have so much but do not appreciate it!! you do not need a million dollar home & $80,000 car to be rich or blessed!! & it seems like you get that!!!!! xoxo

  9. Angelina says:

    Beautifully said……

  10. Melissa says:

    Love love love! Enjoy all of your blessings! And someone doesn’t like it…well, that’s their problem!

  11. sabrina baker says:

    good on you hmm! perfect! ;)

  12. Dizzy says:

    I would not call myself a Christian. As a matter of fact I do not label myself as falling under any one specific religious belief. That being said, your use of the word blessed does not offend me. People of any religion, be it Christian, Jewish, Buddhist, Hindu, Pagan, etc. should not be offended by YOUR word choice. That’s the great thing about having so many options. We are free to make choices. I think you are blessed and incredibly fortunate to have the luck of so many opportunities that life, God, fate has given you :)
    As Christians would say be blessed.
    As Pagans would say Blessed Be.

  13. g says:

    I have a BIG grievance with the post above! How dare you……………place 2 spaces after a period, that’s been thrown out with the bathwater! :-D

    The above aside, I think you are blessed as well, and I think it’s great that you know it and are grateful and thankful for it.

    That is all ;-)

    1. Jenny D says:

      You’re not supposed to put 2 spaces after a period anymore?? When the hell did THAT happen? That’s just insane! Well, rebel that I am, I shall continue to use 2 spaces after any final punctuation for so long as I feel like it! So there. (See, there too. I’m such a bad girl.)

  14. Coco says:

    I thank you for this blog!! Telling the world of your faith in such a public manor isn’t always the easiest thing to do, especially when you’re sure you will get some ugly hateful comments back!! But I can assure you that the good out weighs the bad!! So again thank you for sharing this and giving all of us a small peek into your life!!

  15. Lynn says:

    Amen sister! If more people took the time to realize how blessed they really are, maybe they would be happier.

  16. Brenda Boo says:

    I love the poop out of you. For realz.

  17. Wildvinez76 says:

    I think what you put is amazing and if it comes from your heart then sharing it with others cant be wrong. Reading this post, and by the way this is my first time reading anything you have written, it was inspiring and uplifting and reminded me that I too need to be see all of the blessings that I have. So thank you. I look forward to your next post.

  18. Sami Griffin says:

    Well said.

  19. Stephanie Langlois says:

    You are blessed!! There is no shame in it!!! I haven’t always been blessed or “lucky”. But after years of dealing with fertility issues, I am blessed with a beautiful, healthy baby girl! I am lucky enough to have a wonderful husband who stood by my side thru it all. I grew up without much, however I’ve worked my ass of for everything I have. And you know what?? I am truly BLESSED and happy! Thanks for being you, HMM!

  20. Robyn says:

    I love this and I love you.

  21. Juli Phillips says:

    How easily we forget sometimes how ‘blessed’ we truly are. I ran into an old friend this weekend, we are friends on FB & don’t see each other hardly ever. She made a point to tell me how blessed I am…(BLESSED being the word she used)…blessed with a good, supportive, good looking hubs, 3 beautiful kids, beautiful home & a great career. I was kind of dumbfounded when she laid it all out on me like that & all I could think of to say was thank you…but afterwards in the car I thought about what she said & the you said it just right HMM…Blessed & no other word will do.
    Keep doing what you do…

  22. Melanie says:

    I absolutely LOVE your post!
    Namaste HMM

  23. Sarah says:

    Love it!

  24. Kim says:

    I love your post / page.

  25. Liz Barnett says:

    When I first started my blog, I didn’t utter the word Jesus. Now I post about it all the time and on Facebook and my numbers have grown. Some people have dropped, but I’ve even had people who are atheists comment that they prefer I am true to myself than try to be something else just to please everyone!

  26. lynn ruley says:

    Remember your blessings…..then remember you can mAke some of the ppl happy sometimes but you can piss everyone off all of the time….that is also a blessing….Congrats on a wonderful family…& great blessings….

  27. Noel says:

    I think it’s absurd that you couldn’t say “You are blessed” in this day and age. As a person who is going through some of my own mess and hard times right now, it only gives me joy to see someone grateful and thankful for their blessings. While I’m going through crap now, I still say “I am blessed” because my babies are relatively healthy and loved. Many blessings to you!

  28. Jeanne says:

    Best post yet. Period.

  29. Michelle Merrill says:

    You are very much blessed. We all are blessed with what we have even when we endure hardships. It is at those times ‘we’ sometimes forget our blessings, but we are still blessed.

    I admire you and ALL that you do. You give women strength to get out there and do something and make it ‘there own’. Don’t ever feel guilty for posting your core beliefs because that is what makes you who you are and who we all admire. You are truly blessed and we are truly blessed for knowing you. ;)

  30. drea says:

    HMM….are you a 12 stepper?

  31. Bobbi says:

    Love this, I think it is important to recognize all our blessings, don’t take life for granted! Sometimes those blessings are small, sometimes big! But I am thankful for all of them.

    1. If only we could all have these feelings and share without the worry we are hurting someone .or someone will be angry. Our blessings are so many we could never even count them. I enjoy your posts and admire you for sharing your true feelings

  32. Jessica says:

    I find it to be absolutely ridiculous that someone would look down on another person for being blessed. At all times in our lives we experience love, happiness, heartache, sadness, anger, blessings, and even guilt. Don’t feel guilty because of your blessings. Sat them loud and proud because haters gonna hate. That’s just them experiencing jealousy. I honestly believe that how a person treats you in their karma; how you react is yours.

  33. Holly says:

    Love your guts girlie! Epic writings! Thanks for taking the time to share your infinite wisdom and never failing to help me laugh at the things in life that test my sanity!

  34. Geri says:

    YES! You ARE blessed not only for all of the reasons you stated above, but for being able to recognize it! I believe that if we all stopped and “looked for the good” everyday more people would also feel blessed! It’s sad that most only look for the bad! The other sad thing is that most of those whom you feared would comment on your FB post probably won’t/haven’t even read the blog.. You can tell that by some of the things they say, and their comments.. Again, it’s just easier to bitch! So I say , GET ON WITH YOUR BLESSED SELF!

    1. Vickie says:

      My family and I do exactly that. For several years now, we have gone around the table at suppertime, and each person shares what they are thankful for that day. Sometimes it is just for the food and our family, but sometimes I learn a lot about my kids’ or my husbands’ day by what they are thankful for. Like, that we did not have to put anything back at the grocery store checkout, or that the kid who always hogs the ball at lunchtime soccer was away today, or that I did not run out of gas on the highway when I forgot to check the gas gauge! Sometimes it’s hilarious, sometimes it’s profound, sometimes it’s just the usual, but it encourages us all to go through our day looking for things to be thankful for, since we know we will be called upon to share each night!

  35. Melissa says:

    You are also blessed because you realize the blessings. We’ll said and I’m happy for you and yours. ☺️

  36. Now that we can put this whole “blessed” controversy behind us I would like to propose that the next word we heatedly argue over the proper use of be the word “dandy”. OK everyone GO!

  37. Melissa says:

    Beautiful! I don’t understand why people feel the need to make others apologetic about blessings. You are blessing to all of us- your fans. Thanks!

  38. Tina says:

    HMM I’m blessed also! Great post as always!

  39. Kori says:

    I completely relate to how you feel. There is no other word for it. Lucky, and fortunate just don’t fit for me. I feel strange using the word blessed because I am an agnostic/atheist. But that is the word that I started using this year almost daily since my son was born and my life became ever so clear and bright. I have been told that I should not use “blessed” because I am not thanking a god for my blessings. But I am thanking everyone who has helped make my life so complete and happy. I trying to recognize that what I have on my worst day is so incredibly special and rare. On my worst day, I have love, health, and happiness to go home to. If that is not a blessed life then I don’t know what is. I don’t want to offend anyone in using the word either, and that is certainly not my intent. Thank you for your honesty, and for your humor.

  40. Paula says:

    You do NOT have to apologize or explain yourself to anybody at all. You have followers on their choice. If they think you are privelaged or you owe something to somebody, my middle finger would have to shoot up along with F…U! I’m 59 and don’t owe anything to anybody but my husband, family & some friends! You live your life how u want & don’t change it unless u want!…..

  41. Jo-Anne Rusakiewicz says:

    Thank you SO much for reminding me that I, too, am Blessed! If it it even possible…I love ya even more!#HMMblessesus2#urock

  42. Clarissa says:

    I’m a new fan, and this post rocked.

  43. nancyb says:

    I am blessed…you are AWESOME! And I don’t mean that in a gay way…although I have nothing against alternative life styles…to each their own!! I just love your sense of humor,outlook on life,and believe a lot of the same ways! Keep us thinking, but please! keep us laughing!!#

  44. Fab Henríquez says:

    This is also my circumstance and I couldn’t have said it better. Yes, #BLESSED is the right term!!

  45. Gloria says:

    Stay golden … Beautifully written

  46. Erica says:

    Wow! Well said!

  47. And this post just trumped the bear/juicing/diarrhea post as my favorite. And it wasn’t even funny. Weird. ANNND – I just published a post today about how much I love my son! =) (I feel blessed, too. Undeserving, truly, but blessed, nevertheless.) Love your honesty.

  48. Stacy says:

    HMM…I truly believe we’d all live in a happier world if we’d recognize our blessings more! Kudos to you for acknowledging your blessings, BUT (yes, that’s all caps) I hate you had to define “the why”. People have choices…to read or not to read. Last I checked, I don’t remember you asking me to read your blog or post….i vhose to do it! And, I love it!

  49. Theresa Owen says:

    HMM, you have EXACTLY the right attitude. Your beliefs are yours and yours alone. If you share how you feel, that’s not being negative or offensive or shoving your beliefs down anyone’s throat. I think you are exceedingly conscious and thoughtful in your postings when it comes to belief, yours and others. As you said, it’s your blog and your facebook, so you don’t HAVE TO be. I feel that you do so because you are an intelligent, caring, thinking woman. Anyone who is offended by someone else saying they are blessed needs to take the finger they are pointing and sho….erm, turn it around towards themself.

  50. Lisa says:

    Today, I have read your blog (and Facebook) for the first time ever, and I am instantly hooked. Love what you’re saying and I agree 100%. I am BLESSED to have come across your link and look forward to being a HMM follower.

  51. Hope says:

    I am right there witcha sister. Blessed to the bones I am. At this moment I am living in a basement room without windows, heat/ac or a carpeted floor. Do I miss looking outside, feeling toasty warm or soft plush under my tootsies, you bet I do. However, I see this room with only dry wall and a concrete floor as my little haven. There are still luxuries abound. I am fortunate enough to have friends who have provided a dorm size fridge, which after a few grocery trips I can now pack and fit better than any Tetris game so only two trips to the grocery are required a month. My micro does half of my cooking, and the other is done in a 7inch electric skillet. I have many a tasty meal in that fabulous Christmas present from last year. I also have a 30 inch flat screen on the wall, cable and internet. While my little haven may not be perfect, I am perfectly happy to be this blessed. Thank you God for friends and blessings.

  52. Amy McGuire says:

    Love it… Love you and your page!!!

  53. Kelly Nelsen says:

    Most days I just sit back and quietly read your fb posts and blog. I don’t comment, and generally keep to myself. However…this blog SLAPPED ME ACROSS THE MUHFUGGIN FACE! It screamed at me to get off the pity express and reevaluate my existence. Ugh…THANK YOU. I too, am blessed. It just took someone else pointing me in the right direction. I’m sure my husband and kiddos will be painfully appreciative also. Here she comes to save the day!

  54. MelB says:

    Couldn’t have said it better myself. Very well put!!!!

  55. Susan says:

    I can relate to your post so well. I too am blessed in most of the same ways you are. I was especially touched by this line though, “I am blessed that even in my darkest times and during my worst decisions, no real harm ever came to me.” I have thought this many times and I truly thank God that I am here. I didn’t have healthy pregnancies but I have two beautiful children whom I adopted and for that I am also grateful. Thank you for writing your blog. I am grateful for it. :)

  56. Joyce Lotarski says:

    You are blessed, and so are we as your followers. We wouldn’t want you to change a thing! Stay true to yourself, with that, you can never go wrong!

  57. Jennifer C. says:

    I myself, am an atheist. But I for one, respect you for standing up for what you believe in, in a non-judgmental or hostile way. It’s refreshing to see, so many people aren’t like that anymore these days. I’ve always been kind of a “closet atheist,” but I think you’ve inspired me to be way more open about it. We shouldn’t hide who we are. :)

  58. Kristen Clark says:

    I think you’ve done more positive than you realize… Look at how many people are taking stock in their own blessings simply because you shared yours. That’s a wonderful thing no matter what religion, if any, or what kind of background you have. I’m from a broken home, married and had my first child at a young age, had a childhood disease rob me of the huge family that I dreamed of and has to quit college due to multiple joint replacement surgeries. I prayed and all out begged for a family (and $ to finish college.) Here I am, years later with a beautiful baby girl and wonderful son! And I’m a little more grateful looking at it all thanks to you posting your blessings! I wish you continued success with this page and your blog. Don’t ever be afraid to share your blessings and good fortune!

  59. Vickie says:

    Really?! People would be offended by the word “blessed”? I must not spend enough time on the internet, as I had no idea that word would be offensive to some. How can someone appreciating their life and all that is in it be offensive? I am sorry for all those who would be offended by that, they must have had some pretty bitter experiences in life to allow themselves to get worked up by someone expressing their gratitude for their life. I feel blessed every day of my life, for the fact that I am still alive, healthy, loved, and have a happy, healthy, family (and for so many other reasons). I am BLESSED, and I don’t care who knows it! How can people expect the Universe to provide them more, if they are not even thankful for what they already have? At our house, we each take a turn saying what we are thankful for that day. Sometimes it is just for the food and our family, sometimes it is that we didn’t run out of gas when I thought we might, sometimes it is for something more profound. The point is that we do it each and every night, so we all go throughout our day looking for things to be thankful for. Like Thanksgiving every day. I love your site, and encourage you to keep telling your truth, if others don’t like it, they can leave the page. Kudos to you, from another Hot Mess Mom!

  60. Georgeann says:

    Amen to that! I saw your Facebook page last week and liked it, this is the first of your blog I’ve read but I know that I like you even more now! I believe everyone has a right to their beliefs and I have a right to mine, I don’t judge or condemn people because my God says its not my place. I don’t understand why but I’m sure you will get backlash for yours, which is so hypocritical. My prayers are with you because you will handle it much better than I would.. The Serenity Prayer helps :)

  61. Carrie says:

    I love this. And you.

    I’ve always had a strong faith but seem to find myself putting it in the backseat on FB or on the blog at times. Only to keep the crap down.

    People can be so touchy and so odd if you say too much and some are just as bad if you don’t say enough.

    Thank you for this. It did my heart good to read it. =)

  62. Christy says:

    Way to live!! Never be ashamed to say you are Blessed or to share your feelings about prayer or God. The haters always find something to hate. You might as well be true to yourself and your beliefs! Besides Jesus said “If you deny me in front of man, I will deny you in front of my Father.” I’d rather be hated by miserable people than denied by Jesus! Love your FB page!! A great laugh, just when I need it!!

  63. Nicoleta says:

    I feel blessed myself. So blessed

  64. Alex says:

    I’m confused why people would get annoyed because someone else considers themselves blessed. I agree, many people are blessed. Of course we all have our struggles but we are also blessed. Good for you ! I just love when people realise how lucky they are to be born into the good life they were born into. No one’s life is perfect, but it could ALWAYS be worse !! And it can always GET worse.

  65. Beta says:

    wow, God bless you more.. :)

  66. Yvette says:

    I just recently found you on Facebook. I like you, I think you are funny, and moms need people like you to put things into perspective. However, after reading this blog, I love you! So count yourself even more blessed! I dont think you should feel timid or afraid of letting people know that you feel “blessed”. They were probably attracted to your FB page due to your honesty and humor. Just because you admit that you are blessed shouldnt deter them from reading. If it does, then they werent really supposed to be there following you and maybe it would in turn help lead others to your page and blog! Keep doin what you are doin girl!

  67. KB says:

    I live in the South, so I understand that we hear (and use) the word “blessed” a lot more than most. It’s a part of a daily vocabulary, for most of us. But we also understand that blessings mean more than literal sprinkles from heaven. To us, it means general good things we’ve been granted in life; things that we didn’t go about intentionally and willfully creating, and absolutely not expecting. It covers all good things that eventually came upon us, no matter what led to its occurrence. There’s also yet another example, for those who aren’t familiar: when I say “bless your heart”, it doesn’t mean that I’m asking God to bestow heavenly strength to your blood pumper. It’s sarcasm, and no it’s not sacriligious to use the phrase. People can ask any good southern preacher or Granny and they’ll tell you the same. Having said this, I will say to those who don’t like your use of the word BLESSING and felt the urge to complain about it – bless their ugly hearts.

  68. HeadBitchInCharge says:

    This is the most honest and truly inspiring piece that I have read in a very long time. A reminder to be grateful and appreciate what one has is never a bad thing. I don’t normally follow blogs, but I can relate to this so very much and wouldn’t want to miss a single posting. Right/Write on you crazy bitch!!! :D

  69. Miriam says:

    Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us. Feeling blessed is never something to be afraid to admit, and counting your blessings is a wonderful thing and I too do it every day. I’m glad I found your Facebook page and I enjoyed reading this blog about you and your family. Enjoy all of your wonderful blessings.

  70. Stefanie says:

    Amazing post. Thanks for sharing.

  71. Bridget says:

    So often we get caught up in the everyday that we forget to realize how blessed we are to have that day! Well said, I couldn’t agree more if we stop to realize how blessed we are, we put love back into the universe and hopefully that will reach another and bless them in return!

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