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Hot Mess Mom » Family, Stellar Parenting Advice, Ways I know I'm failing as a parent » I am a genius. A little cruel, but geniusy….

I am a genius. A little cruel, but geniusy….

 

I think I’m onto something!!

Sooo… Number One is lazy.    Like ridiculously lazy.  If given the choice to stare at the wall or take a walk, he will stare.    And I’m not judging him….  I was a super lazy kid too.  I get it.  I do.  I was also totally motivated by social acceptance.  As is he.  And that’s not great either.  I don’t want him to be me.  I want him to be better than me!

Today I caught a big break!  And I’m taking all my knowledge of 11 year old ME and applying it to 11 year old HIM. 

I usually drive the kids to and from school.  It’s a little over 2 miles.  It’s through our neighborhood.  No main roads.     This morning, Seven rode bikes to school with the kids.   This afternoon, I rode my bike up to accompany them home. 

It should be noted that the highschoolers get out around the same time.  So you have a “socially motivated” 5th grader riding a bike home with his mommy & 2 little brothers in front of super-cool highschoolers.    He would rather die. 

Therefore….I made him a deal.   

Stay ahead of us.  Go as fast as you can.  Bike like the wind!   Your brothers and I will ride normally.  We will not TRY to beat you.  But we also are not going to lag behind purposely.   If you want to distance yourself from us, you’d better push yourself!   If your brothers pass you up… no worries… you won’t be lonely cuz Mommy will stay right with you.  Just you and me.  Biking together.  Maybe I’ll sing showtunes.  Really really loud.  Or introduce myself to the highschoolers getting off the bus.   Or hold your hand.  You can ride one-handed, right? 

Needless to say…after debating whether to laugh or cry….  that boy FLEW home!   He was a good block ahead of us the whole ride, even on the hills.   I’m so proud of him!   He hates me, of course, but that’s okay.   I’m a genius.    I’m loving myself enough for both of us ;)


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Filed under: Family, Stellar Parenting Advice, Ways I know I'm failing as a parent

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9 Responses to "I am a genius. A little cruel, but geniusy…."

  1. Karrie says:

    oh that’s beautiful-

  2. Kelley says:

    Sooooo funny!!!! I can just imagine those little legs pumping away so he doesn’t have to be seem with cruel, psycho mom singing show tunes!!!

  3. Nicole Fowler says:

    I love it! I threaten my kids with dressing up like Ragety Anne again and dropping them off at school when all of the kids are out front. <—- really happened. I have a very lazy one too. I am taking notes! You make my days better by the way!

  4. a teacher says:

    I think I read almost every post!! LAUGHED AND LAUGHED! Outstanding!!!

    1. Hot Mess Mom says:

      Thanks Teach!! Glad to have you ;)

  5. Ellen says:

    That is some good parenting. :)

  6. Lauren Bayles says:

    D-You’re Number 14 on Top Mommy Blogs? So impressed! How the hell do I vote for HMM?

    1. Hot Mess Mom says:

      Lauren~ just click on the Top Mommy Blogs banner. That’s it. EVERY DAY!!! ;) xoxoxo

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