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Hot Mess Mom » Dear Diary, Family » Do you believe?

Do you believe?


So…..  Santa Claus.  

I am a crazy Santa Claus mom.  Crazy.   Santa gifts are in seperate wrapping paper, tagged with printed tags {nothing handwritten}, artfullly arranged on the hearth instead of thrown haphazardly under the tree.   Bits and peices of carrots are left in the front yard {because we all know that reindeer can’t be such neat eaters} and Santa always leaves crumbs around the table that I complain about having to wipe up. 

When Number One was turning 8, I figured that would be his last Christmas as a believer.  Then, at 9.. I KNEW it was our last year.     By 10, we were on borrowed time for sure.   Now he is almost 11.   His brothers are 7 & 8.   

Here is my question….   do I tell Number One about Santa  (Obviously, I’m figuring he already knows and is just humoring me at this point)?    Do I talk to him about it and let him be part of the “grown-up team”… helping us provide convincing Santa  moments for his brothers?   Or do I never say a word..   continue on and on about Santa and let him quietly disbelieve? 

What do you do?  What is your practice?    I’m sooo torn.      Christmas is never the same after you lose Santa….   


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Filed under: Dear Diary, Family



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25 Responses to "Do you believe?"

  1. Laurie says:

    The rule at our house is “DO ///*NOT*/// RUIN IT FOR MOM” – and if you know, shut up… play along. and… We have a sign that goes on the mantle. WE BELIEVE IN SANTA. It’s large, and permanent. Don’t mess with me on Santa.

    Life is short. Have fun.
    p.s. The presents *IN* the stockings have more meaning to me than anything ever found under the tree.

  2. Liz says:

    I would let him quietly disbelieve until he mentions it to you. He might still enjoy the festivities even though his beliefs may be changing- I know I still do!

  3. Liese says:

    I had a quiet chat with my number one when she was 11 or 12. I was worried she would get picked on if her friends found out. Since then she’s been Santas helper and gets some special treatment like staying up later and knowing what the other kids are getting. She also gets to make mommy eggnog cocktails and help mommy into bed after too many said eggnogs. Number one is the lucky kid.

  4. shynook11 says:

    Let him believe, as long as he can

  5. Earth Muffin says:

    Our oldest is 11. He started making some disbelieving comments about Santa, Easter Bunny and Tooth Fairy just after he turned 9. We had a conversation with him about it and made it clear that it was important not to spoil the fun for his little brother. He has been really good about playing along.

  6. Kelly says:

    If you do not believe, you will not receive. That’s our rule.

    1. Teri Freel says:

      Mine to..:0)

  7. Teri Freel says:

    Mine are grown now..:( But O never talked to them about it. I to am a beg Santa mom. I did the whole thing to. I still wrap gifts from Santa. and we all believe are image of Santa has changed They know he isn’t a Jolly man who lives in the North Pole with flying raindeer. But we know and the memories they have Just leave it alone D.
    if he comes to you then talk to him.Just my opinion of course!
    Merry Christmas..

  8. Chrissy says:

    My friend had a ceremony with her oldest. She became a “keeper of the magic”. It sounded really nice and honored the sanctity of Santa and Christmas, i think she even gave her a bell or something.

  9. Elizabeth says:

    Never give in. I always told mine when they asked that it was a matter of faith. If they didn’t believe, then they ran the risk that Santa Mom might lose her excitement over the whole thing. Thus, fewer gifts (since I owuld no longer have to package two separate sets.) Man, writing this out makes me sound a bit manipulatie, doesn’t it?

  10. Kelley says:

    We’re in the same boat right now with our youngest. I know he doesn’t believe anymore, but he hasn’t come right out and said anything. He’s never asked a single question. We always make 2 xmas lists, one from parents and one from Santa. So far, we’ve only made 1 list and he hasn’t mentioned the other one. I know this is going to sound awful, but I’m kind of ready to be done with it. It’s so much easier to just be able to wrap everything and put it all under the tree. Don’t judge me!! I have a very-soon-to-be 19 year old!!! I’ve done this for that many years!!!!

  11. Cayce Carter says:

    D – would rather chat with you than write all of my feelings down. BUT I will tell you that as the oldest of 3 I was hearing things from my friends and telling my parents – way to early – 2nd grade. They didn’t want me to spoil it for my sisters soooo – my Dad took me outside to the treehouse and told me EVERYTHING! No toothfairy, Easter Bunny, Santa, all of it. According to him, I cried hysterically and he felt awful. He and my mom decided never to tell my sisters – just let them figure it out on their own and ask their own questions – that is what I am planning on doing!

    1. Hot Mess Mom says:

      Cayce~ I love when you comment! Thank you!
      And yes.. even though I think it could be bonding for us, if there is a 1% chance that he still believes, I don’t want to chance it..

  12. Ellen says:

    Leave it alone. This is definitely a let the child lead situation. Don’t ask, don’t tell. :)

    1. Hot Mess Mom says:

      Thank you! That is exactly what I am going to do!!

  13. Easter Bunny says:

    Am I missing something? SC is real, no?

    1. Hot Mess Mom says:

      Of course he is! He’s your roomie!! I was talking about whether or not I should tell him ya’ll were gay….. ???

  14. Mendy says:

    It was always a strict “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy at our house. My Only knew there was no Santa around 4th grade but didn’t want to risk not getting the extra gifts, so she wouldn’t say anything. Finally she ask me about it and I told her that I believed in the “spirt of Santa”. My husband & I spent many Christmas Eves after the little night owl finally went to sleep, drinking rum and cokes or spiked coffee drinks to stay awake, putting together the Barbie Dream House, or bike, or whatever WOW gift Santa was bringing that year so that it would be fully assembled and unwrapped in front of the tree when she woke up. We loved/hated it.
    We also always put a stocking overflowing with goodies at the foot of her bed from Santa, which was great because that kept her busy, and gave us an extra hour or so of sleep. My Only is now 16, we still do this, and she still loves it. The big gift is easy now, nothing to put together, and she usually is pretty sure she is getting it. The stocking is the tricky part because I always try to put special things in there that she is not expecting. She LOVES her stocking, and I will always do that for her.

    Maybe we are weird, the Easter Bunny still leaves a basket too!

    1. Hot Mess Mom says:

      i love you guys!!! Saw your hubs the other day.. We definately have a date after Christmas! Miss you!!!

      1. Mendy says:

        I would love that! Let’s put it on the calender.
        Geez, that makes us sound old. Remember when you had no calender,
        and didn’t worry about what day it was? Oh, so long ago…

  15. Jenny says:

    My number one was around 9 when SHE ASKED ME. I told her that I do the work but it is because of St. Nick and told her his story. Yes there is/was a santa and that it is our job to carry it on. I then made her promise to keep it going with the others. I decided when number 2 turned 9 that I should tell her too. I wish I hadn’t. She was stunned but took the new knowledge and job well. I feel like I squashed her dreams. With that, number 3 is now 9 and I plan on keeping my mouth shut!

  16. Leslie says:

    what? There’s no Santa? You mean I’ve been living a lie for 40 years? Thanks HMM. Thanks a lot for bursting that bubble.

  17. erica says:

    We unfortunately had a situation when Medium was four and Big was ten. Medium was hospitalized with pneumonia and a secondary bacterial infection over the Christmas holidays. He went in the 18th. We were told on the 20th he wasn’t responding to treatment and may not come home. As you can imagine it was horrible. We spent a lot of time with him at the hospital getting friends and family to stay with the other kids at home, 10 yr old and baby. We were finally told on Christmas Eve that he turned the corner. Everything looked good.
    We hung a sign on the door that said “Christmas is NEXT week, don’t tell” and we literally MOVED Christmas.
    We had to tell Big. He knew what was happening…and Christmas was just an afterthought once he realized how sick his little brother was.
    I remember telling him that about the ‘spirit’ of Christmas and how we are ALL santa’s in one form or another…and that we would wait and celebrate when we could all be home together.
    so..once Medium was safely home…we had Christmas the following Sat. I hated to be the one to burst his bubble but we had no choice.

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