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Hot Mess Mom » Million MILF March » Colgate; the MAN, not the toothpaste.

Colgate; the MAN, not the toothpaste.


ONCE UPON A TIME, 250 women converged upon New Orleans for a weekend of Laughter & Frivolity.  There were a few dozen brave men who joined them in their weekend antics.  There were husbands, boyfriends and friends.  And there was a brother.

This brother was extremely attractive.  The organizer of this frivolous weekend was a little messy.  In addition to hugging and kissing and declaring her love for this brother (not her’s .. feeling the need to clarify since the event WAS in Louisiana ;), she insisted on encouraging the other 250 ladies admire him as well.

Look at HIM… she would say..  Come.. stare.. touch…   you may never get this chance again..   Feel his arms, hug him..  He smells good.  

The brother was an EXCELLENT sport.

“Will you write about me?”  he asked.

“If I remember you”.  She replied.

“Really?? You might not remember me?”  he asked incredulously

“Um, I’m inviting strangers to touch and stare at you….  In case you don’t know… I’m a hot mess.”

A week later, the Hot Mess, still attempting to fully recover, woke at mid-night and thought to herself..  I MUST write about that handsome boy.

However, as anticipated..  she could not remember his name.



BUT…. lucky for me..  we have pictures!!  Lots and lots and lots of silly messy pictures!!  And THERE he is.. this handsome creature.   You may or may not know that my husband surprised me by showing up at the MMM..  Which made me so happy..  But for several reasons, we could not have our pictures taken together.

I told him..  “Hey Seven.. see that smoking hot guy over there at the bar?  I’m going to take all of my pictures with him.  He will be my stand-in husband.  I may even give him tongue”    Seven {after 16 years with me} said…  Okay honey…

So.. here he is.. this handsome creature.  Not knowing his name doesn’t matter because my friends were calling him “Colgate” the whole day..  because….. ‘duh… did you SEE that smile?’

HMM, The MadWoman, & Colgate

Colgate and his sister- blogger “Old Dog New Tits” I bet ALL the girls wanted to have slumber parties at her house growing up


No caption needed.


My friends who named him “Colgate” ;)









It’ my birfday!! yum.



















A huge thank you to Colgate for being such a good sport and to Old Dog New Tits for bringing him!!

{click that banner y’all!!}

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8 Responses to "Colgate; the MAN, not the toothpaste."

  1. Kati says:

    I commented on the first picture on Facebook and my husband saw it. He has now been giving me a hard time for days that he shouldn’t have to shave since I clearly like a man with a little stubble.

  2. That … is … hysterical! Okay, I’m forwarding him this link right now. I think he had a lot of fun. Me, too. Count “Colgate” and me in for next year!

  3. Harley Quinn says:

    Oh.My.God. Colgate is a hot one. I actually think he should be pictured somewhere in next year’s promo logo…Like a hot, smiling, selling point (not that you need one because MMM is fab on its own as are you). I’m going to go drink in bed now… I really wish I hadn’t missed this.

  4. Madwoman says:

    I’m not going to drink in bed, cause I’m already drunk, by I so remember Colgate. I was petting him. He was a nice pet.

  5. Freaking loooove this :D LOVE. LOVE. LOVE. Why is my toddler yelling, “Mommy! MOM! PIZZA!!” from her crib. I want to read more posts. Stupid responsibility. So happy you had a blast!!

  6. JDR says:

    You are too funny!

    Highly highly flattering. Thank you for all of the kind words.

    You were a ton of fun, as were your fellow Floridian MILF galpals.

    I’m not sure if this is in NOLA every year or not, but if it is you can count me in again next year.

    Take care!

    (I would sign it Colgate but I just can’t do it.)

    1. Hot Mess Mom says:

      it WILL be in Nola! Thank you so much for playing ;). And.. i’m looking at your email, I don’t know if any of those are your real name but none of it rings a bell. lawdy.. Colgate forever ;)

  7. anne rue says:

    I want to go back!!!MMM was so much fun!! And hey Colgate the Florida girls will be looking for you next year!! ;)

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