Discussing your kids on Facebook- the good, the bad, & the ugly
I have a blog. Officially, I have a “Mommy blog”. Clearly, I talk about my children. I talked about my children before I had a blog. I shared stories with friends on the phone, in person, via email, and eventually on Facebook. Our Facebook pages are an extension of our person. It’s the new millenium’s version of the diary we let our girlfriends read. If something is private, you don’t put it on Facebook. All else is fair game– fodder to be shared with the masses. I enjoy the fodder. I enjoy Facebook. I like “knowing” what is going on in peoples lives without all that pesky personal contact. I like to see pictures of my friend’s children as they grow. I enjoy watching family vacations unfold. It’s fun to see statuses … Read entire article »
Filed under: Dear Diary, Family, Ramblings, Stellar Parenting Advice, Things that are NOT awesome
Why I make Christmas my bitch
I am a sucker for the holidays.. Actually, if you read this blog, you know I am a sucker for any holiday… St. Patrick’s Day, July 4th, Labor Day.. Any excuse for a party.. I’m in! But this season… from early October when I decorate from Halloween through New Years… THIS season, I love. I love the decorations, I love the music, I love the feeling. I’m not as nutty about Thanksgiving themes and decor but it still one of my favorite holidays as we spend it in New Orleans with my enormous family… {our Thanksgiving dinner is 109+ people of immediate family… more if the youngsters bring dates} You know how people get so pissed when the stores put out Christmas decorations at the same time as Halloween? I don’t. … Read entire article »
Filed under: Dear Diary, Ramblings
I wish I was TRULY anonymous
You know I don’t show faces on HMM. I don’t use names. I’m anonymous. Except I’m not. My friends know who I am. My neighbors know who I am. The parents at the school, my family, my in laws… they all know who I am. And THAT, my friends.. pretty much sucks. When I began HMM, I had no idea what it was going to be. No clue what I’d write about. Not in my wildest dreams did I expect it to be read internationally and have the best and most loyal readership in all of blogdom. When I started, I asked my personal FB friends to read, comment and share the blog. I don’t know if I could have done it any differently. I don’t know how else the word … Read entire article »
Filed under: Dear Diary, Ramblings, Things that are NOT awesome
i’m giving up on my dream
My dream is dead. It’s very sad. I really really REALLY wanted a pair of red booties for this winter season. I did. I do. I did. Since I cannot be trusted to shop in person, I only shop online. Over the past 6 weeks.. SIX WEEKS.. I have ordered, received, and returned 5… FIVE… FIVE pair of red booties. FIVE! In six weeks. All are too high, too narrow, too big, too small, too trashy or too expensive for the quality. All are wrong. I took one last chance.. I ordered a 6th pair… I had high hopes. I was disappointed. I guess I am not supposed to rock the red booties this year. What a bummer. My 2012 winter clodhopper dream is dead. Damn it. Okay.. as I’m attaching pictures to … Read entire article »
Filed under: Drunk Blogging, Ramblings
Reason #10727 why my life is just plain silly
There has not been ONE specific happening over the past 48 hours that is ridiculous or crazy or silly or messy. Not one particular incident. However, the 48 hours combined is so typical of the HMM Family that I’m just going to walk you through it and invite you into our normal. Friday night: Roaring 20′s party. You saw the pics.. it was sooo sooo much fun. My kids had a sleepover with their cousins. Muffy, Two-Carat Princess, Ice Queen and I donned tassels and feathers and flapped our way through the evening like professionals. We did the Charleston (very 20′s) and shots of Jagermeister (not very 20′s). It was a super fun, super silly and only half-way messy night. Being that I am a whore for theme….In addition to getting my make-up done … Read entire article »
Filed under: Family, Ramblings, Ways I know I'm failing as a parent
I’m a narcissistic cryer. And it’s all your fault.
So… to be a blogger.. you really need to be kind of a narcissist. Why else would you think that people in the cyber world would be interested in anything you have to say?? Us bloggers… we are a self-absorbed bunch. We may not want to admit it.. but again… come on… I honestly think that there are people out there who WANT and NEED to know when I put expired things in my vagina, yell at my children or have an exceptionally good meal. NARCISSIST. That being said…. although I’ll admit to being a self-absorbed douche-canoe…. it’s still sometimes very hard for me to take a compliment. Nice words make me uncomfortable. I’d rather you say “Right-On you dumb whore!” than to tell me that I have influenced of affected your … Read entire article »
Filed under: Antics, Dear Diary, Featured, Million MILF March, Ramblings
Why I love Muffy
This is NOT a topic that you will probably ever see me write about again. EVER. You know how you have your best best best friends and they compliment you and love you and make you feel good about yourself? I love those friends. I have many of them. Friends who I hug too tightly for too long. Friends who are kind and loving and hold my hand when we walk down the street just because we are so happy to be together. Friends who I share a bed with on girls weekends and stay up all night talking and giggling. Muffy, the 2-Carat Princess, Ice Queen and I…. are NOT those kind of friends. We are barely nice to each other. We do not touch. We get all of our … Read entire article »
Filed under: Dear Diary, I may be PMSing..., Ramblings
My very own Elaine…
If you are an avid reader of HMM, occasionally you will see a comment from Brenda Boo. You will remember these comments if you’ve read them because they are written so beautifully that you wonder what angel can string words together like that. Since I’m bogged down with the Million Milf March and Gooley is stepping up to fill some space.. I’ve also asked Brenda Boo to share some of her beautiful prose with you. This is how that went : (*note: not unlike the rest of you.. Brenda Boo has never met Gooley, but they have begun an online love affair) Me: Hey Boo… since I’d rather read your words than anyone else’s, why don’t you do some guest posts also while I’m gone? Take some pressure off Gooley. Gooley: YIPPEE!!!!!! Boo: Gool….Here I am … Read entire article »
Filed under: Ramblings
don’t be too annoyed with me. i know i suck.
Listen.. I know I am the shittiest blogger in history right now, And I’m sorry. I really am. And if you are on my Facebook or Twitter, you are probably soo fracking sick of hearing about the Million MILF March, you want to block me. And I totally get that.. for realz… But to be honest… I am all MMM all the time. And I probably will be for the next several weeks. I get up at 6am, turn on the laptop, and turn it off around 10 pm. In between, I’m marketing and soliciting and whoring. Oh, and watching the Olympics. And not eating. And letting the kids have unlimited time on the iPad, Wii, and DS (which NEVER happens at my house) just so they will leave me alone. I am overwhelmed. … Read entire article »
I love the Olympics. But I’m having a few issues.
I LOVE the Olympics! LOVE! Winter or Summer….doesn’t matter… I could watch them 12 hours a day for 3 weeks. I don’t. But I could. Obviously, I have my favorites like everyone else… swimming, gymnastics, beach volleyball, diving…. But I even like to watch the boring stuff… well, not really rowing, or ping pong… but many many other events. People who have given their whole lives to ONE thing…. YOUNG people who have the drive and focus to be among the BEST in the world….. Older athletes who keep coming back for more… 4th and 5th Olympic experiences…… all of them amaze me. Truly amazing. I wrote a post several months ago called Superwoman I am not. It explains that I am the queen of “good enough”. Whatever the gene is that people … Read entire article »
Filed under: Dear Diary, Ramblings
Recent Comments