Articles Comments

Hot Mess Mom » My F*ed up Dreams

i swear i don’t own crocs

    Had a dream last night. Had to attend some function as HMM.  It was a large, outdoor venue.. maybe a festival or concert of some sort. I had to get on the stage and thank everyone for coming. I was wearing a tank top, a peasant skirt, and high heeled crocs.  With socks. The crowd was clapping when they said “Hot Mess Mom would like to say a few words”, but as I got on stage, the crowd hushed and I could see looks of disgust on everyone’s faces.    Someone pulled me aside and said.. “Wow, I thought you were really cool and we had a lot in common..  but those shoes.. and the socks…  tragic” Later, my Facebook page had 0 likes and advertisers started asking me for thier money back. Anyone want to try … Read entire article »

Filed under: My F*ed up Dreams

Now I even get mad at Seven in my sleep.

  Dreamt last night that Seven decided to share with me all of the people he has hooked up with on the road.  He didn’t think I’d be too mad since there was no intercourse so it was technically not cheating. At 1:30 am  I woke up to pee and was so mad at him and I wanted to suffocate him with his pillow.   It took me so  long to get back to sleep.  I awoke this morning still angry. OMG.  I had a dream last night that you told me about all these people you had hooked up with on the road, but there was no “intercourse” so you didn’t think I should be too mad. {laughs} It’s not funny!  I’m still pissed off about it.  AND you knew their names!!  You were … Read entire article »

Filed under: Dear Diary, Family, My F*ed up Dreams

I went to Brad & Angie’s wedding. And didn’t get blown up.

I went to Brad & Angie’s wedding.  And didn’t get blown up.

AAAaaaaannnndddd…… here we go again. Last night’s dream: I was invited to Brad and Angelina’s wedding.  I think it was in New Orleans, but I was there with  my Florida friends, so I’m not completely sure.   There were probably about 1000 people, and it was open seating.   Everytime I chose a seat,  my table would fill with people that I did not want to hang out with, so I would move.  Seven told me I was rude … Read entire article »

Filed under: My F*ed up Dreams

I have herpes. But only when I sleep.

I am the most non-jealous wife in the universe.   Seven travels for a living.  He is a good looking man.  He runs in some pretty high-profile circles.  Half of the time he’s out of the country.  If he chose to get laid, he could.   I decided a long time ago that I would not/ could not spend my life wondering about what someone else was doing..     I do not worry.   Seven is a good man and he is faithful.   He is also a grown-ass man who is capable of making and living with his own decisions.  I trust him completely.       I only tell you this to explain that once again… my subconscious has completely overruled my conscious mind.   I don’t understand where my dreams come from..  (and I don’t understand how … Read entire article »

Filed under: My F*ed up Dreams

Dreams. lord.

   I think it has been established that my subconscious is a strange, dark land better left unexplored.   Except for I have to sleep.  And it loves when I sleep because it gains power.  It’s the monster in my head.   Not a scary “i will kill you” monster..  More of a  ” let’s steal stuff and go get drunk” kind of monster. Soo.. last night’s dream.  (it’s a little choppy…  may be hard to follow…  ) My sister (who is neither battered nor poor) moved into a shelter.   And, like most things in my family, nobody talked about it.  She was just suddenly sleeping on the floor in a shelter with her one baby.  (in real life she has 3 kids)   I went to visit her a few times, but kept saying “hi” … Read entire article »

Filed under: Dear Diary, My F*ed up Dreams

My mind is just not right…

  So…  another dream sequence…  Wow.   (see Tylenol LSD Flashback post  for more insight into my redonk subconscious) First Dream: In the mountains with a bunch of people.  I think I worked with them. Maybe.  There was a beach.  Right at the side of the mountain.  We had to share rooms, and somehow I was sharing with someone from a different company.   Don’t remember much about the middle of the dream…but then it was time to go..  There was a guy… he wasn’t Elvis, but he was some big rock star (?) and he was telling me the “secret way” to get down the mountain.    To the best of my memory it went a little something like this: You have to go up before you go down.   Go to the end of the drive and take a left … Read entire article »

Filed under: Dear Diary, My F*ed up Dreams, Ramblings, Uncategorized

Tylenol LSD flashbacks…

  I have bouts of insomnia several times a year, each lasting a few weeks to a few months.  It sucks.  This year I started taking Tylenol PM.  And then I stopped.  I call it Tylenol LSD.  I had the batshit craziest dreams when I took it.   Not scary, just bizarre– like living in Fallujah, teaching monkeys sign language with my high school boyfriend.  And Seven was the director of the Iraqi Monkey Sign language program..  Weird weird stuff. Needless to say, I had to stop taking it.  I was physically rested, but mentally exausted after these very intense forays into my subconscious. But here’s the thing….  the Tylenol LSD has obviously opened some portal in my mind that probably should have remained closed.   I have always had very vivid dreams and usually remember … Read entire article »

Filed under: Dear Diary, Featured, My F*ed up Dreams, Ramblings, Uncategorized